Chewing Too Much? Our Comedian Talks About his Compulsion
One of the eye-opening moments in my life was after a colonoscopy, when a doctor told me that I wasn't chewing my food. "What do you mean? Of course I chew my food! I don't swallow things whole like a snake! Do you see a mouse stuck in my throat?!!" Despite my protests he sent me to an eating specialist. Which I thought was insane.
After dining together, the specialist pointed out that I had finished my veggie burger before she'd even put mustard on hers. I was rushing through my meals, just like I rushed through life. She instructed me to chew every bite forty times. Forty chews per bite?!? Let me tell you something: that bites!
Although I found it impossible to keep up with the rigorous chewing regimen, I now try to do what I can to slow down my meals. I use chopsticks--I sit on my hands in between bites--sometimes I sit on my chopsticks. Occasionally, just to show off, I'll chew a piece of dried mango 47 times--although people are never as impressed as I think they should be.
And now whenever I chew gum, I consider it practice. I just wish I could buy a pack without putting all 18 sticks in my mouth at the same time.
This entry last modified on: January 9, 2013 2:45 PM
About the Video
The original “hyper-chondriac,” author and humorist Brian Frazer on why your mother was right about chewing your food.